09/09/2010

This is a very personal piece, written a year ago, and unrelated to any of my previous posts
So bear with me.


I have to leave you now
Goodnight and Goodbye
Until some time in the future....?
Lightheartedness faked
I smile, and let you go
     The miles begin to separate
     And the urge grows stronger
     Everything inside screaming
     Turn back - RETURN!
     I floor the gas pedal
     Burning up the road
     But speed cannot fill the hole
                You left
     I cannot box you away.

My heart itself betrays me
I can think of nothing else
Your soft voice telling me stories
Late into the night
I punish it for it's treachery
I push it far away
Sulkily it retaliates
Telling me I will ever be alone.
     Too far away for the Knight to rescue
     Too surrounded by problems and Dragons
     Too far away for him to hear my call
     Dying alone; old, sad, and alone
     Nor - if only I'll turn around....

I turn the volume up
The radio blares out into the night
It can push away the thoughts, for sure
Deaden the thoughts
Remove the thoughts
Make the turmoil cease
     But every song is about you
     About moments together that
     Will not be
      I change the channels to no avail
      There is nothing I can do
      I give up trying and let
      The tears fall freely
      Almost there, almost there
      I can let sleep draw me into oblivion.