I almost considered calling this blog "Not a Grandchild" after the somewhat repeated saying: "God has no grandchildren". I have a post being written out, but it is through open office, and that isn't installed on this computer.
I never really thought much about the saying, because I never understood the implications.
I am sure all of us have heard (John 14:6):
Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.
But how many times has this been applied in family situations? While the man is the head of the woman, is the father a priest to his children? Or are they allowed to boldly approach the throne of grace on their own merits?
God has no grandchildren
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That was one of my father's favorite sayings, he'd quote it often, but when it came down to real life he thought he had to make all decisions for his daughters, rather then allowing us to develop consciences of our own. His will was supposed to be God's will for us. Ugh.
Ugh indeed.
There is a lot of (false) pressure put on parents in some religious circles to raise perfect children with perfect lives. It is such a snare to take on that false sense of responsibility. Why would anyone want that?
To avoid the shame and shunning religious people will whip out on us parents should fault be found in our children. :\
That's why it is hard as a parent to let go and trust God. Both of my children are dating wonderful human beings right now, but their dates are not believers. At one time the professed faith of the person would have been more important to me than anything.
(Even allowing them the freedom to date is enough to get me excluded from many religious circles! But dating people who don't profess Christ! I am branded total failure as a Christian parent.)
But I have seen so many professing Christians be so twisted in their relationships. These people in my children's lives are loving, morally upright, self-controlled, emotionally healthy people. How can I be against that?
I have to trust the Father, that He will truly work all things out together for the good of those who love Him- including my children.
The Father who was faithful to me will be faithful to my children. I can trust Him. He loves my children more than I am capable of loving. He can speak to the deepest depths of my children's hearts, while I only have a human voice. He is with them always, something a parent can never accomplish no matter how hard they try to dominate and control.
My only other option? Manipulate, shame, and shun to try to force my children to reject all non-Christian relationships. But how is that righteous? Christ LOVES these people!
And so I walk by faith, and not by sight...
But just so those of you who are children understand, I will bear shame for this stance of allowing my children the freedom to love and be loved outside of the proscribed religious paradigm. Christian family will either try to manipulate me to manipulate my children, or (more likely) shun me and speak negatively of my character and my relationship with God.
I am willing to bear this for my children's sake. If God is truly God, if He keeps covenant to a thousand generations of those who love Him, if He is the Good Shepherd the Bible say He is, then I can trust Him to have his own relationship with my children. I can trust Him to lead each of them in the way they should each go, the way that is best for each of them.
I do not expect perfection anymore. I do not think that was ever the goal. Love was the command, and the backdrop was supposed to be all the world. ALL the world.
And that is scary, and requires a LOT of faith!
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